McSatan’s Spawn: Meet McPrincess Meghan McCain – Twice the Spoiled Rich Kid Paris Hilton Ever Will Be!

This adorable, spoiled Louis Vuitton toting celebutant is John McCain’s 4th child, but is really his 1st child from the marriage he wants everyone to remember.

This charming spawn of McSatan and his Ice Princess wife lives the good life… Designer everything, luxury New York loft bought and paid for by Mommy (and her kept man hubby McCain), private jet flights, no current job to speak of except “campaign Princess.” She makes Paris Hilton look low rent!  (and the Hatchet Man should know, he used to ghost write for the heiress herself)  

And now she’s helping Daddy get elected so she can get the coveted slot as First Daughter!  Take that Paris and Heidi Montag!  You better support Obama or you’ll have new competition for that cover space on In Touch Weekly!   

Never mind the fact that she voted John Kerry in 2004 and is a self described social liberal, she got properly brain washed (with peroxide) such that she finally switched affiliation from Independent to Republican this week! (I think the threat of getting cut off probably had something to do with it)

But let’s take a look at the life of Meghan McCain through a slideshow of pictures taken from her blog McCainBlogette.com

1)  Here’s darling little Meghan being chaffeured to a campaign jet, with souvenirs from her Everglades “fun in the sun” trip.   (She says it was a climate change event…riiiight… I saw the accompanying pictures racing around on pontoon boats and working on her tan… I’m sure she’ll be roughing it in Alaska for that next climate change events soon, right?)  Isn’t the spoiled life taxing???

Spoiled rich socialite Meghan McCain being chauffeured around, Louis Vuitton bag in tow

2)  Sometimes its exhausting having Mommy and Daddy pay your way through life!  After so much fun in the Florida Sun, sometimes McPrincess needs to kick back in a luxury hotel suite and enjoy the simple pleasures of life, like a room-service grilled cheese sandwich.  Just like Mom’s personal chef made back home!    

Its hard work being a rich celebuspawn!  Meghan McCain enjoys R&R and room service at her luxury Florida Hotel suite

3)  Some people might criticize Meghan McCain for being born with a silver spoon in her mouth, but they’re forgetting about the golden plates that accompanied the silverware!  Like at this banquet for Daddy.  With so much opulence and the frequency of $5,000 a plate meals, who can blame a daughter for packing away a bit of junk in the trunk!   

Meghan McCain dinner... Born with a silver spoon in her mouth to accompany those golden plates

4)  Sometimes being a rich American Princess can be so lonely!  Its hard to find other people who relate to the life challenges that come when everything is handed to you on a plate!  Thankfully, there are others like Meghan who grew up in the wealthy aristocracy and benefited from their family’s name… like Donatella Versace.  OMG, here the two of them are sharing their kinship!  I can only speculate what was discussed, but I’m sure they traded hair bleaching techniques, bet each other whose dress is more expensive, and discussed Meghan’s career path as a fashion designer, which Donatella had to keep from laughing at.  

Uber rich socialite Meghan McCain mingles with those who really understand her, Donatella Versace

 

Britney Spears to Hillary Clinton: Stop Monopolizing My Press

While the Barack Obama campaign has been struggling to get their message heard above unending the cacophony of “how crazy will Hillary Clinton get” stories, quietly one of America’s biggest tabloid stars has seen her unending fount of press run dry no thanks to Hillary stealing her ink – Britney Spears.

Long the reigning queen of “psycho-delusional, train wreck press” stories, Spears has been pushed off the front page by her most formidable of attention seeking rivals – Hillary Clinton – and it took an effort of near Presidential proportions.  Britney’s the victim of a harsh media reality, namely that editors’ reserve only so much space for “disastrous celebrity tailspin” stories. With Clinton and the Lohan’s taking up all the recent front page real estate reserved for “crash and burn celebrity free falls,” Spears has (*gasp*) faded to the brink of oblivion.

Britney back at the Height of Her Crazy Reign, Before Hillary Clinton Stole the Title

Normally, political figures, particularly distinguished senators, avoid slinking into the role of side show circus freaks, relying on pop stars to fill the niche, but Clinton’s obliviousness to math, self-mutilation (in the form of poorly phrased quotes about RFK), frequently changing motivations about why she’s running, and complete disconnection with the existing, non-imaginary world has sent the press into feeding frenzy not seen since Spear’s was committed for similar erratic behavior back in January 2008.

Hillary officially gained the crown of top delusional celebrity train wreck, long held by Britney Spears

 

As Clinton continues to push gossip-rag-mainstays to the back pages, many other train wrecks have been left scrambling, with Lindsay Lohan going to the extreme of dating lesbian Samantha Ronson just to overcome the glut of Clinton press and maintain a tenuous grasp on the forefront of public consciousness.

Lindsay Lohan went Lesbian this week only to barely steal some of Clinton\'s lock on crazy train wreck press

Meanwhile, Spears has not been so lucky. Her mid-May trip to Costa Rica with Mel Gibson went largely unnoticed. Her new love, William Morris agent Jason Trawick, has barely gotten one-one thousandth the publicity of former flames. Finally, as of press time, news of her $10 million Las Vegas comeback show barely made the steamy London gossip pages.

Media insiders are dubbing this “The Hillary Effect.” “You just can’t out crazy Hillary Clinton at the moment,” commented one reporter. “When it comes to the train wreck beat, she’s got the monopoly on it.”

The Spears camp is resorting to a Vanity Faire shoot just to try to pry some limelight away from media whore Hillary – though Spear’s announcement of the shoot fell on mostly deaf ears.

While tabloid stars suffer from Hillary “outcrazying” them, John McCain’s campaign has aired few complaints about Clinton’s press dominance.   The were particularly thankful for the diversion as he hosted a fundraiser in Arizona alongside the politically toxic Satan George Bush.  His campaign has been similarly unbothered by Hillary’s press monopolization as he dealt with uncomfortable issues like his wife’s tax returns, release of his medical records, and his continued opposition to the Democrats expanded GI Bill, among other politically charged events the presumptive Republican nominee has conveniently side stepped during the last week thanks to Hillary.

The few sources still covering Spear report that she is thriving since handing over her “America’s top train wreck” crown over to Hillary.

(Picture:  Britney enjoying and thriving in her newfound anonymity with reported bf Jason Trawick)